Wednesday, July 11, 2012

10k and a Half Marathon...

I ran 10k on Sunday! I Did It!

I ran it in 1 hour 22 minute and 4 seconds.... I am still in a wee bit of pain from it, but it was awesome... April and I ran for 15 minutes then walked for 1 minute the whole time. It was hard but I felt so accomplished when I finished. We finished together, holding hands as we sprinted across the finish line. It was a good day!
The Results

Now, I just signed up (like an hour ago) for  the Disney Princess Half Marathon in February! Yikes!
I am running to cure Rett Syndrome... there is a donate button on the sidebar here that you can donate to the cause --------------------->
every little bit helps and keeps me motivated to run those 13.1 (21k)... and belive me, I will need all the help I can get!!!

And just look at this face- how could you say no to this face???

Thursday, July 5, 2012

New Orleans, Training & Goals...

You guys, I went to New Orleans last month for a Rett Syndrome  conference. It was amazing to meet other moms and other girls who have Rett Syndrome just like my daughter. I learned a lot, and I ate a lot... I really tried to be good- until the first night... food in New Orleans is awesome! I figured I would try to make smarter choices while not denying myself the tasty, scrumptious food they have there. Mmmmmmm Creole!
So because of this food I gained 8 lbs while I was gone- totally worth it though! I had almost made my goal of 167 by June. I was at 167.8, but then now I am back up in the 170's. But its okay. I am now back into the swing of things and getting ready for my 10 on this Sunday (July 8) and for the Mud Hero race on the 22nd!

the weight it wrong but everything else is right
My friend and I went out running on holiday Monday and we decided that because we both slacked a little (her) and a lot (me) while I was gone we wanted to see just if we would be able to even do 10k. SO we set out in fish creek park and ran....and ran.... and ran.... we did our Bridge to 10K app and just reset it when we got to the end and started over until we made it 10k... well we actually went a bit longer than 10k- almost 11k and then we walked for 10 minutes back to our car. I was so proud of us- we actually did stand honestly, besides being sore the next day I wasn't dead by any means.

Then last night we ran again but just did the program once, which is about 45 minutes of running (15 min run, 1 min walk x 3) and it was still hard but again, we did it. Its funny to think back to when I could barely run for 3 minutes and 6 seemed impossible!!

So I have made myself a goal for the month of July. I am going to lose 10 lbs and get rid of 100 things.
Right now I weigh 171.8 and by the 30th of July I will weigh 161.8 (if not less). My kids will be gone for a week so during that week I will be living at the gym or in fish creek or whatever I can do to get my butt in gear- plus its a bonus the 2 races I will be doing this month won't hurt in the weight loss process!
As for the 100 things. I've been reading some blogs about people who purge 100 things a month- I bet I have enough stuff to do that but I am starting small. 1 month, 100 things. I figure I probably have about 30 pieces of clothing- if not more I can get rid of so I'm already a third of the way there!!

So I will check back in and let you know how things are going. 10 lbs. 100 things. Changing my life!!

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

5k and BIA...

I am really not great at blogging- good thing it's not my job!!

So I have been trying really hard the last month or so... except for when I went to Mexico on a much needed vacation without the kids!

But before Mexico I was training with my good friend April to run the Mothers Day Run and Wlk here in Calgary- I probably didn't train as hard or efficiently as I should have but I still ran it- and I ran the whole way! I was so proud of myself because there were multiple times throughout the run that I thought "I'm just gonna walk for a bit--no Tanis, don't walk! Wait a little bit longer" and I kept waiting and then I saw the finish line and even though it was forever away I couldn't justify walking when I could see it- though at times my run was barely faster than the walkers beside me!!
But I finished and my time was 41:33- not too shabby for a first timer!

I'm the out of focus one in the corner- but look I'm smiling!! Ok, so I smiled any time I saw a camera so in case they took a picture I wouldn't look like I was dying!

So I went to visit Dr. Morgan again today and did another BIA test.
I'm actually proud to put this one up because I have made progress- no more stagnant results!
I have lost 3 pounds of fat!! See ya later FAT!!
fyi- on my scale I'm a lot prouder of myself since it reads that I weigh 168.8- I am back in the 160's!!! My goal for the month of June is to get to 167- I am so close you guys...
If I keep eating like I am and exercising like I am I know I can make it there and beat it... I just hope that when I go to New Orleans in a week (for a Rett Syndrome Conference) I don't let myself go too much. I am going to try really hard!

Plus, April has somehow convinced me to run a 10k on July 8th, and then we signed up for the Mud Hero run on July 22 and then I have signed up for the Spartan Race on August 18- I am going to either be so fit or dead by the end of summer!!
Lets hope it's fit!!

Oh and BTW I can now run for 30 minutes at a speed of 4.9 on the treadmill for 30 minutes without dying! I'm alternating upping my speed and lengthening my time - I gotta say April has been a great motivator in helping me through the rough patches of this journey... thanks April!!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

I'm back...

Hello to any of you who still may be following this blog. In case you hadn't realized that I tend to shy away from blogging when I'm not doing the best.

I am still stuck in the 169-172 plateau that I've been on for the last few, well, months. I know the answer is get back to eating the way Dr. Morgan told me to and get back to the gym regularly.
So I am trying.

I actually signed up for the Mothers Day run & walk on May 13th- its a 5k. My first ever. This wasn't supposed to happen until August when I run the Spartan Race but my good friend just returned from school out in Halifax and we have become workout and running buddies.
Actually tomorrow we are going to try to do a practice 5 k in her community while her mom watches Owen.
I don't run outside, I never have. Until monday, I tried and man its hard- I remember someone telling me that running outside is easier than on a treadmill but I beg to differ. On my treadmill I have music, TV and no hills. Outside its hot, hilly and boring. But, after using GPS I was thrilled to learn that I had gone just over 2 miles and a 5k is 3.1 miles- So I am a little more okay with possibly not dying while running on the 13th!

Well, wish me luck for tomorrow and the 13th! I will try harder to post more often and hopefully it will be good news more often than not.

ps. I am now on monthly visits for my BIA so I will be posting that next one right before I leave for Mexico!!!! yay!

Saturday, March 31, 2012


So this weeks BIA (sorry I am late posting again- Melia is on spring break and makes blogging hard) was not as bad as I thought it would be. Still not great- I am still trying hard to get back into the mind set of healthy eating and exercising more. You would think I would be able to get back quickly but it has been hard. I guess old habits die hard, and honestly if Owen doesn't cut some of his teeth soon I am going to give him some steel wool to chew on!!! Kidding, but seriously he has been teething FOR-EVER!! Those teeth of his keep coming to the surface and then going back down and I am at the end of my rope with that kid- which usually sends me running for crappy food... but I am going to try really hard not to let it affect me as much.

So if you look at my fat mass it is at 61.0 lbs. When I started back in January it was at 70.9 lbs thats 9.9 lbs of FAT!!!
My lean body mass is pretty much the same 117.5 now and 117.6 then. Hmmm guess I gotta hit the pump class a little more often!!

Anyways, I am going to make a goal right now- and I've heard its not a goal until you write it down and tell someone else, so I figure here I will kill two birds with one stone. My goal is no Mcdonalds for the whole month of April.... I'm hoping this will just lead to not ever wanting it again since I've also heard it takes 21 days to create a habit- I want my habit to be not eating mcdonalds when I am stressed out. 
My other goal is to get down to at least 165 (on my scale) but the end of the month... hopefully more but I'm looking at baby steps again. So on Dr. Morgans scale I guess that would be about 173.

So there we go - it is written so I will do it!!!

ps. How bad is it that my brain just thought 'I should go get mcdonalds right now since its the last day before I can't for a whole month' urgh... stupid brain!!!
Good thing the kids are in bed and I can't leave the house!!
Let the health begin again!

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Back on track??

Well this week I have followed Dr. Morgan's rules on getting my butt back on the treadmill.
I had my wonderful older brother come over on Thursday night to help move my 3-400 lb machine upstairs to the main floor so I would be more motivated and could watch my good tv with my pvr'd shows- anything to get my mind off the actual exercise!!!

Anyways, I've also been eating lots better and this morning I weighed myself and it read 169.6! The lowest weight I have been since before I got pregnant with Owen. And .2 lbs lower than I was before I fell off the wagon.

That is motivating and encouraging. I'm excited (or as excited as I can be about exercise) to get back on the weight loss track!

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

urgh x 2

Ok, so the reason I haven't been blogging is first- my life is insane. and second- I'm embarrassed at my lack of progress and as of toady my set back :(

I can't for the life of me find my BIA test from Friday but here is my one from today.

I don't even want to go over the numbers. I'm quite upset with myself. Not that it is terrible, I mean I've technically only gained a few pounds but still, I am headed in the wrong direction!

I have realized that Mcdonalds is like crack cocaine for me- Once even a little bit is in my system it is SO HARD for me to stop. Though as of Saturday I haven't had any. A friend and I are doing a '12 step' program for my Mcdonalds addiction, she is my 'sponsor'.

I need to get back on track- I guess that has been my song and dance for the last couple posts hasn't it.
But seriously I do.
I did pretty good today. I need to go on the treadmill though and motivation is hard to find.
Dr. Morgan told me I have to go on it everyday for the next 7 days. So I guess I had better do it.
I think I need to move my treadmill upstairs so that I can watch my PVR'd shows while I walk/run because honestly it is so boring watching regular TV downstairs.

Ok. I'm headed to the treadmill.... lets hope I can get my act together already!

ps. Thanks for all the helpful tips and encouraging words either in the comments here or on FB or through my email. I really appreciate them all!!

Friday, March 9, 2012

Confession time...

So if you know me, or have been reading all/most of my posts, you probably know I am a stress eater. And a secretive stress eater at that. I will go to far lengths to hide the crap that I eat. Because if no one knows I ate it, it doesn't count right??!! I wish.
So for me to actually come right out in cyber space and tell you what I ate this week when I was pushed to the edge of stress is a big thing for me. I am going to try to be completely honest.... which will result in me being ashamed.

First off, being a mom is hard. Then add being single. Then add in my daughter who has Rett syndrome. Then mix in a few ruptured eardrums for my son- along with teething. Then put a dash of depression and a pinch of laziness (because if I am being honest, I have tendencies to be lazy- if I didn't I wouldn't be where I am right now). Bake that all in a house that is old, dirty and comes with a roommate who is loud and drives me a little bit batty, until you have cabin fever.

That is what my life feels like right now. I'm not saying this to give myself excuses, because I don't want to give myself excuses, just a glimpse into why I am stressed and on the verge of tears a lot lately.

Now, throw in the fact that I have been eating crap and it makes it all worse. Guilt!!! Man, this is a depressing post!

So I broke down and got Mcdonalds last friday. I told myself I didn't have groceries that I wanted to eat and I was pushed to my limit by the kids that day and I didn't eat well during the day so by the time dinner rolled around I was done and I broke down.

This wouldn't be so bad if I just had it that once and then went back to eating good... I wish I could say I did. I've had it about 4 other times since last Friday. I've also eaten some chocolate trifle thing and ice cream. I'm so irritated at myself each time- yet obviously not enough to stop eating that way.

Now, I still went to the gym so it wasn't a complete fail of a week but I guess what I need to know- any advice is welcomed and appreciated- how do I get past these gross cravings/depressed feelings again and stop eating this way.
Just stop right.... urgh.

When I went into Dr. Morgans on Wednesday my BIA wasn't terrible. It actually showed I lost fat and gained some lean muscle and a bit of water weight. As awesome as that is I kind of hoped it would've been a crappy printout so I would have that knee jerk right back into eating healthy.
Now, my Phase Angle went down lots, but, really that is such an obscure thought in my head and not as definitive as Fat or Muscle that it didn't really 'phase' me- lol!

Anyways, thats my rant. Hopefully by next Friday- I have a dentist appointment on Wednesday so I won't be seeing Dr. Morgan until Friday- I can say I am back on track.

Friday, March 2, 2012


I did it! I did it! I weally, weally did it!  
*sung like the kid from Kid History- if you haven't seen it- episode 6 is my favourite!

I ran the 6 minutes on my couch to 5k plan! AND... I didn't totally die!

I want to say Thank you to my sister for her advice of running more than just the 3 times and to Katie for telling me to run slower- I used to run at 5.5 on the treadmill but slowed it down to 4.9 and finally accomplished the week 4 day 1 runs!!!

So heres to being able to get through week 4 now and move onward and upward!
Also, I got some new shoes so my calf isn't cramping anymore- so thats 2 great things!
Wanna know a 3rd great thing??
I saw my trainer this morning (the one I hired when I first joined the gym for a 3 session package) He did their version of a BIA on me and he was very impressed! He couldn't believe how well I was doing- I think they usually offer this so that when you see how you are doing without a trainer they can say they will help you do better and try to push the training again...which is ridiculously expensive! But he didn't, and he was (I think) a little shocked at my progress without him!

So heres a little Toot Toot on my horn!!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

a day late...

I have to apologize to all of you faithful readers who were probably sitting in front of your computers all day yesterday just hitting refresh over and over waiting with baited breath for my weekly update. :)

I had to take Owen to the walk in clinic and it turns out the reason my little man has been a whiny, unbearable, fuss pot is because he has an ear infection that this morning turned into a ruptured eardrum that was leaking all out of his ear. He had this last month too- poor kid.

Anyways... Dr. Morgan was quite proud of me this weeks weigh in. At home on my scale I weighed 170.6 and on his scale I was at 178.5- almost back to where I was before I had that weekend of, never mind, I just googled what debauchery means and I did Not have a weekend of that :)
So here are the numbers for this weigh in...
Phase Angle - 6.9 up from 6.3 last week... definitely because I have been remembering to take my DHA fish oils each day!
Okay so my Fat Mass hasn't changed much but thats okay too. Its like on Biggest Loser when they have a week where they loose 1 pound or even gain no matter what how hard they worked out- or at least I like to think of it that way.
I did loose 3.7 lbs of Extracellular Mass, which is the amount of water found in your body outside of your cells- so I lost water weight which is wonderful.

And take a look at my ECM/BCM- if you remember from my explanation post you want it to be 1 and look at where it is.....tada!!!!

My BMI has gone down from 31 to 30.6 so I'm still technically in the obese category but only by .7 can't wait until I'm only in the overweight category!! And once I get down to 140 I will be in the normal weight category!!

Monday, February 27, 2012


So the weight I gained has been coming off again- yippee! This morning I weighed in at 171.6.
Not as fast as I wanted it to, but to tell the truth I haven't been as diligent as I was at the very beginning. That's is going to change- I want and need to get back on track again- not that I was very far off, maybe just dipping my toes into the 'not so great at eating' pool.

I just signed up for a crazy 5K for August. It's called the Spartan Race and apparently I am going to feel like I'm dying as I do it? Thats what my brother says anyways (He is getting back into shape and doing it with me, or I'm doing it with him since he signed up first and told me about it)
It consists of obstacle courses and running and guys dressed up like spartans pummelling you with those giant foam gladiator Q-tip things. I'm a little worried.
But I'm signed up so either I will rock it or I will die trying :)

So because of my little cheating moments I think it is making it harder for me to run. I'm on week 4 of the 'Ease into 5K' running app and it goes like this:
5 minute warm up
4 min run
2 min walk
6 min run
3 min walk
4 min run
2 min walk
5 min cool down

Now this isn't much different from the week 3 routine which is run3, walk 2, run 90 sec, walk 2
which I could do fairly well, and not be totally dead after it, but since I started week 4 I haven't been able to finish a single one- and I've tried 3 times so far. That six minutes kills me every time and I can't do it no matter how hard I push myself. There is usually 3 runs a week, but I think I am going to be stuck here for a while, at least until I feel comfortable running 6 minutes. I hope its sooner than later. Though the runs just get harder and longer from here. By day 3 of week 5 it has me running for 9 minute stretches-yikes!

Maybe it's been hard since I have't been sleeping well, Owen doesn't sleep through the night and I've decided that when he gets up I'm not going to him anymore- but, since he is sleeping in my closet (its a big walk in don't worry) I have to head down to the couch which isn't great, and I am not sleeping great. Lets hope he learns to sleep through the night, I can get back into my bed and I'll be able to run better!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012


This weekend was not good. I am quite disappointed in myself.

On Thursday morning I weighed 169.8, I was so happy to be in the 160's even if it was only.2 lbs into it and I was really hoping not to get back up into the 170's. I went down south with my kids and on Thursday and Friday I was really good, I walked on the treadmill (I tried running but the treadmill was too hard or didn't have enough give or something because it hurt my knees so I walked instead.)

Then came Saturday- the day of the wedding. In the morning (breakfast) I was good, of course, but as the day went on and I was running around snapping photos and didn't eat when I should've and then when it was time for the reception they were serving soups (creamy ones and one vegetable pasta kind) and croissants with chicken salad on it. I decided I would have some of the vegetable soup and a croissandwich. It tasted so good- remember I have been craving bread!
Within an hour or so I started to feel gassy again. And then I ate some sweet stuff- fruit dipped in chocolate to be precise. I was tired and my defenses were down so I gave in.
Well, it didn't stop there, I ate more junk. I tried again to be good on Sunday and for most of the day I did really good. But then Monday came around and I blew it big time. My girls and I went to brunch and I had a sandwich and sweet potato fries and for dinner I had a Dairy Queen burger meal.

Can I just say first off, it didn't taste nearly as good as I remember them tasting, and secondly, for the rest of the day & night I felt like I was going to puke and had this heavy lump feeling in my stomach that just felt disgusting. Totally NOT worth it!
Plus, when I weighed myself yesterday morning I was back up to 175.0 lbs! SO not worth it!

Well, I went in for my weekly weigh in and here were my disappointing results.

I am back up to 180.5 (remember our scales are totally different) BOO!

My Fat Mass went up to 62.6- which is really only up 1.4 lbs, but I had worked hard to get rid of those 1.4 lobs, and I don't like losing the same weight again and again... I did that before Christmas- the same 6 pounds over and over- and I am done with that.

And look at my Phase Angle- 6.3 not cool!

But what I have learned from this is that now that my body is used to eating healthy it doesn't want to have all that junk in it. I felt sleepy and cranky and heavy and bloated and gassy and gross and.... well I think you get the idea.
Now I at least have that out of my system. I don't think I will be thinking about, craving, or wanting any burgers or junk food anymore. At least not for a loooong time. It just isn't worth it.
I like feeling good. I hate, hate, hate when I'm bloated and gassy.

Next weeks weight check will be better. Hopefully I can get those numbers back on track and I will be feeling thin and awesome again!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

It's wednesday....

This is what my week has been filled with.
His sister hasn't been much better!
I just got back from Dr. Morgan's office. I was totally prepared to hear that I wasn't doing so good again this week- because, let's face it, I wasn't doing so good this week.

I have been stressed.

Owen is teething-which turns him into a little clingy monster- and Melia hasn't been sleeping which turns her into a bit of a monster too, resulting in me not getting to the gym until yesterday (Tuesday). During these stressful moments, there have been a few times where I forgot to eat when I should have and I even had *gulp* 2 ju-jubes on Monday. Otherwise I really tried hard to eat right and not let myself give into the stress addictions that would be Mcdonalds and chocolate and candy!

I was surprised when I got my printout, the work I did do definitely paid off!

(look at me! I actually scanned it in!!)

So here is my BIA for this week.

Phase angle is still about the same- last week was 6.7, this week 6.6
I'm working on it.

Fat Mass - it's going down!! I love seeing that number drop.
Last week I had 64.1 lbs of fat in my body, this week I have 61.2 lbs of fat- goodbye 2.9 lbs of pure FAT!

Oh and my weight... (according to Dr. Morgan's scale) is at 178.0 down from 180.5 last week totaling a 2.5 lb weight loss.
Which means I have gained a little bit of muscle... Check out Lean Body mass, it is up by .4 lbs not tons but still, I'm going to bench pressing my kids soon!

Lately, I have been in a rut with what to eat as well, I felt like my life was salad after salad after salad... I was getting bored. And who wouldn't. BUt I know it's because I don't enjoy cooking (I really want to, but I am a baker at heart) and so thinking up meals and all that just doesn't jive with my brain.

Anyways, last night I decided to make a stir fry. I haven't been a big stir fry fan, but I do like going to Open Sesame and they are a mongolian grill type stir fry restaurant so I thought, might as well try it. It was delicious! 
I used whatever veggies I had on hand (broccoli, red, green and yellow peppers and celery), and for the sauce I sautéed some garlic cloves and shallots that were minced up in some oil. Added some soy sauce, worcestershire sauce, chili powder, and red pepper flakes. Then I added in some sesame seeds at the end, and I forgot to top with cilantro which I had planned on doing.

I think that you will be proud- I know I am- Valentines day came and went and not one piece of candy or chocolate went into my mouth... I was tempted but I held on strong! :)
I talked to Dr. Morgan about my cravings though, and he said I can chew gum. I haven't always been a gum chewer, unless I have some stinky breath or something and can't get to my toothbrush. Yet, I think this will help curb those times I just want something sweet. I bought one of those dessert gums. The creamsicle one. I really want the mint chocolate chip ice cream one though. I think they will do the trick. I'll let you know.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

170.4 lbs...

...According to my scale! Which means that I've lost 10.1 lbs since starting this new eating and lifestyle regime with Dr. Morgan. (And if I count from the time I got my gym membership and started trying to lose weight then the grand total is........17.4 lbs)

I've gone to the gym (or the treadmill) everyday this week except yesterday- Man it was such a jam packed day and I just couldn't get there.

I've also noticed that when I am rushing around and don't, at least a little, plan what I am going to eat- like thaw some chicken or salmon, or make sure I have some easy to grab fruit or veggies for snacks, then I make not great eating decisions. Or sometimes if I'm dealing with my crazy kids and stressed out then I forget to eat all together- not good. So I have been setting an alarm on my phone that will ring about every two hours to remind me to eat.

I've also noticed that for the past week or so I've been going to bed later than usual and not getting as much sleep as I would like. I'm talking like 11:30, 12, 1 am. This is definitely causing me to lack the energy I should be having from working out and eating right.

My goal this week is to get to bed early again, between 9:30 and 10 pm. I just may have to post my Up band sleep stats each day so that I can be accountable!

This Saturday I am shooting a wedding (I'm a photographer) so I will have to figure out how I will be able to eat, drink lots of water (without having to miss special moments by being in the bathroom) and making it through the day without a coke. Weddings are looooong days and but the time the reception hits I am bee lining it for the drinks and getting a coke, or two, or three. It helped me make it through the night and stay alert for the rest of the evening. So this weekend I will just have to drink water because I can do this. I don't need that, right??!!

Plus, I will be spending the weekend at a relatives house and so I will definitely have to be very aware of what I am eating and everything.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Shoeless Joe...

...or should I say Tanis.

I got to the gym today and realized I didn't have my running shoes. I thought about going home, but since I had already packed up Owen and lugged him all the way to the gym, signed him in and gotten into my workout gear, I figured 'oh well' I'll just take a ride on a stationary bike. My calf has been cramping up a bit lately anyways so I wasn't too keen on running today anyways so it kind of worked out. So I did just over 30 minutes on the bike and then about 30 minutes weights.

No excuses right! Oh and my pants are definitely starting to feel looser! woot woot! I wonder how long until I am in a size 12...then 10....then 8!

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Weekly update...

This week was rough in the workout department but I did get in as much as I could considering the sick/teething children hurdle. 

So here is my print out from this weeks BIA test. (Sorry it's a bit grainy this time- I really should just start using my scanner, iPhone is just so handy)

As you can see I am now 180.5 lbs! Thats a total of 8 pounds lost in 3 weeks! 

Lets compare:

Fat Mass Day 1: 70.9 lbs
Fat Mass Day 21: 64.1 lbs

So I know thats technically a 6.8 lb fat loss, but still. that's almost 7 lbs of fat gone! Isn't that gross- I have 64 pounds of fat in my body-  35.5% of me is fat! Yuck!

Intracellular Water Day 1: 52.5%
Intracellular Water Day 21: 53.1%

That's up .6% getting closer to that 57% goal and farther away from my cells being like a senior everyday!

Phase Angle Day 1: 6.6
Phase Angle Day 21: 6.7

So not the best, improvement wise, considering I did go up to a 7.0 and then back down but improvement is improvement right.

BMI Day 1: 32.3
BMI Day 21: 31.0

Can't wait until I am not in the 'obese' category for that one!!

So these numbers definitely helped me to see that when I am stressed to my max (as I was this week) and have not gone to Mcdonalds or to get chocolate, that it is worth it. 

Isn't this a creepy picture - It's from Supersize Me
I don't know if I've explained before that Mcdonalds was my go to food when I was stressed. I didn't really want it. I knew it was bad for me and actually taking me farther away from where I wanted to be and was probably keeping me depressed and stressed. 
Yet, somehow I would find myself in the drive-thru ordering a Big Mac meal with Coke. There were even days that I am ashamed to say I went more than once, and some weeks where I would go pretty much every day- switching up which ones I went to so that the employees wouldn't recognize me. Such a thing an addict would do! I would also hide the fact that I ate it. I was embarrassed to be eating it, let alone eating it as often as I was.

So as you can see, me not having any Mcdonalds (or any fast food for that matter) is a BIG thing. Especially this week! 

Well, since my roommate isn't home and the kids have just gone to bed, I am heading downstairs to show my treadmill a little love. 

Monday, February 6, 2012


Waking up to two sicks (again!) is putting a cramp in my style.

I had planned to take Owen to the gym with me while Melia was in school and get back before my supportive roommate meeting at 11, then shower while Melia's aide was here and Owen napped.

My day has gone more like this...

I wake up to a little girl with a horrible hacking cough and green stuff pouring out her nose.
Followed by crying, whining kids who just want to be held and yet don't at the same time. I am still in my pjs at 3 in the afternoon- and those pjs are covered in all sorts of fun stuff from my children- boogers, food, drool...
I didn't get to the gym,obviously I can't take my sick kids to the daycare. Owen fell asleep a little before 11 and Melia conked out within the first half hour her aide was here and I was in my meeting (yes, in my pjs) from 11-1. When they left I was going to go on the treadmill and then possibly shower but noooooo Owen decides to wake up. Then Melia wakes up around 2.

So here I am at 3pm, wondering how in the world I am going to be able to get on the treadmill- or even eat what I need to since my kids won't leave me alone (in case you are wondering how I am writing this, I have strapped both kids into their respective high chairs with zippy cups full of chocolate milk- and yes I understand this will probably make their phlem worse but I am willing to risk that for a few minutes of unattached sanity!)
I just ate lunch too- it's definitely been a bad day for this program. I'm trying, I really am. Hopefully a miracle will happen and they will both be healthy tomorrow?!! I can only pray right!

Lets hope I can get on the treadmill after the kids go to bed and that I am not too wiped out at that point to do it.

Well, as the chocolate is emptied from their cups, chaos is starting up again... wish me luck!

Sunday, February 5, 2012

update on the week...

Alright, so I took Dr. Morgans directions seriously. I went to the gym on wednesday after our meeting and did my couch to 5k program.

Then again on Thursday I made it to the gym- yay me! Couch to 5k walk/run program followed by some weight work in a circuit program.

Friday I didn't :(  
I know- but I am planning to go on a nice brisk walk today in the sunshine so I guess instead of taking Sunday off, I took Friday off.

Saturday I went again, but my calf cramped up pretty badly about 22 minutes into my walk/run session so I took it easy and spent a good amount of time stretching. It's still a little sore, but a lot better. This will not turn into an excuse to not exercise - NO EXCUSES!!

So I've also been doing really good with my eating. Actually getting some fruit into me - those who know me, know I am not a fruit person, it is not my snack of choice. I do like pineapple and grapes and I will eat fruit but its hard. I am not a berry fan (inset gasp here) I just don't like them. never have. probably never will. too many seedy bits and they all taste sour... anyways, but i have been eating grapes and apples and cherries.

I'm also on the lookout for a really good eggplant lasagna recipe. minimal cheese, most likely vegetarian since the cheese will take up a protein serving... anyone?? I may just have to experiment on my own if my google abilities fail me.

This picture came from a possible recipe I may try (with a few modifications)- so far it seems like a good one... Dr. M, what do you think of the recipe?

My scale this morning read 174.0- Another pound!! I love seeing the numbers going down knowing that I am not starving or depriving my body of nutrients it really needs.

On Thursday night I went out with three of my best friends. I've known these girls since 6th grade (except for one I've known my whole life). We went to Chilli's and before I went I looked up their menu so I would prepared and not have those delicious Southwest Egg Rolls staring me in the face as I tried to figure out what to eat. It was hard to not order them, but I was strong!

I ordered the Quesadilla Explosion Salad- with modifications of course. No cheese, dressing on the side, no tortilla strips. I let them bring me the cheese quesadillas that come with it just so I could take them home for my kids for lunch the next day. I also had them put some black beans on it since I needed my daily legume still. I had the citrus vinaigrette with it but I think next time I am going to ask for salsa instead- my friend did that with hers and it looked scrumptious!

It was yummy- definitely worth the money (unlike the other salad!) It was filling, delicious, and I will order that again if/when I go back.

I have had a lot of compliments on how good I am looking lately. I think part is because of the weight loss, part is because I am off my anti-depressants (yay me!) and the other part is I am just feeling really good and happy that I'm sure people notice that!

Wow, this post is a little bit all over the place, sorry. I just want to share one last thing.

On Friday night I went to a church function where they served us dinner. I wasn't sure what to expect but usually these are pretty healthy meals... It was, we started out with a spinach salad with apples pumpkin seeds and feta, with some raspberry vinaigrette. I ate it, knowing that the vinaigrette may have a bit of sugar in it and also knowing I hadn't had any protein yet that day so I could have a little bit of cheese and the chicken for the main course and be okay.

The main course was chicken (lightly breaded with panko I think) cooke carrots and peas and baby potatoes. I had three baby potatoes, as my category 2 vegetables (and a few carrot slices), and I scraped a bit of the breading off, but I couldn't get it all so I ate it. It was all mighty tasty, yet within about an hour I was feeling bloated and gassy. I hadn't really thought about it until then, that for these last few weeks I haven't been bloated and gassy like I usually was. Also, and this is probably TMI- but I have had regular bowel movements since starting eating this way too.

Okay maybe just one more thing...

People keep saying how hard it must be not to have carbs and sugar and chocolate - and it is sometimes, but I am loving the way I feel so it's not that hard. I do miss bread!  In church we have the sacrament where we get bread and water, and let me tell you I savoured that little chunk of bread for as long as I possibly could!!
But while I was nursing Owen he was pretty lactose intolerant so I stayed away from dairy and cheese for about 8 months and was fine. Chocolate, I miss that too, I like sweet things, but right now I would choose bread over chocolate, no doubt about it!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I got caught...

Alright, so I went in for my weekly BIA test and lets just say that right away Dr. Morgan could tell that I had not been as adamant about my walking. I am supposed to walk briskly for at least 30 minutes a day- and that is the bare minimum - and well, last week, I can honestly say I don't know how many times I walked but it wasn't very many. Though if I'm counting wednesday to wednesday since thats when I meet with Dr. M, then I guess I know for sure of 1- Monday. Yikes. I am almost ashamed to put my BIA on here. Not because it's horrible- it's not, I even lost 2 pounds (woot woot), but because I know I can do better and I didn't and it reflected in my results.

But in full disclosure here is my BIA results.... (sorry about the crumple- my son got to it!)

As you can see, my Phase Angle went down again.

My Fat Mass went up a little bit.

And my ICW percent went down.

Dang ME and my not walking~

The good thing is the 2 pounds lost- which brings me to 183.0 on Dr. Morgan's scale (and 175.0 on mine- I definitely feel better about my scale!)

That is a total of...... 5.5 lbs
(though on my scale it's 5.6 lbs- but then again, I weigh myself first thing in the morning, after I go to the bathroom, before I eat anything and without any clothes so it will always probably be a little more)

So I went to the gym on Monday and walk/ran for about a half hour and did some weights.
Yesterday I didn't do anything :(
Today I went to the gym and walk/ran again on the treadmill but I was short on time so I didn't get any weights in. I will try to do some free weights at home tonight after the kids go to bed.

I really shouldn't have any excuses, I own a treadmill and the weather hasn't been all that bad, I should be taking the kids out for a ride in the stroller.

Anyways, I promised Dr. Morgan that I would at least walk everyday (except Sunday) in this wed-wed block. So even if I just blog 'I walked today' or 'I ran at the gym' then I will be holding myself accountable and next week my numbers will be closer to where they should be!!

Monday, January 30, 2012

A Good Day...

Today was a good day. I went to the gym and did a good workout consisting of a couch to 5K run and some weight work too. (Couch to 5k has a great app too that plays your music and tells you when to run and when to walk so you don't even have to look at the clock, which is always hard for me when I see just how long I have to keep running etc.)

I ate all my food today. A bowl of oatmeal- I got some steel cuts oats and hopefully I can use one of the recipes I found online (gotta love pinterest) for my crockpot.

I also have decided that as much as I love Balsamic Vinaigrette I need something else to change up the taste of my salads so I googled a few recipes and then decided just to mix and match and create my own. Man, it is delicious! It transformed my salad into something really tasty!

Here is the recipe I mix, matched and kinda created I guess.

Roasted Red Pepper Vinaigrette

3 red peppers, 1 yellow pepper & 1 orange pepper roasted
3/4 cup red wine vinegar
1 cup olive oil
2 cloves of garlic
1 scallion
1 tsp salt

Roast peppers in the oven on broil until the skin is blackened and blistering. place in a bowl and seal tight with plastic wrap. Leave until they have cooled, at least 20 minutes. Peel the skin off, slice and put in blender. Add all other ingredients and blend until smooth.
Put on your salad- or whatever you want- and enjoy!

I am thinking of taking a bit and adding some red pepper flakes or maybe a spicy roasted pepper or something and see how that tastes- a little bit of spice is a good thing!

This salad I would've paid $12 for. Romaine lettuce, diced chicken, black beans, sunflower seeds and my dressing! So Yummy!!

Sunday, January 29, 2012

$12 for Lettuce??

So I went out to dinner for the first time since starting this program. I took the kids and their dad tagged along to help with the chaos that would ensue!
Actually the kids did really well, the only 'freak out' was as we were leaving and Owen didn't want to be wiped clean. I call that success!

Anyways, we went to East Side Mario's where I ordered their Garden Chicken Salad minus the croutons and with the vinaigrette on the side.

This photo looks so much better than what I was served. I got a plate full of iceberg lettuce, 3 cherry tomatoes, 3 olives, 2 spicy peppers and what I think was 1/4 of a grilled chicken breast.
Needless to say I was quite disappointed. You know how salads ALWAYS taste better when someone else makes them, especially at a restaurant.... nope, the salads I have been making at home would put this one to shame! I hate that I spent $12 on a plate full of lettuce. I definitely won't be going back to East Side again in the near future!

Oh, and when the kids meal of Alfredo pasta and french fries came out and they brought out the all you can eat bread sticks I had to literally make a conscious effort not to just mindlessly pop a few in my mouth. It was a feat of strength I tell you! Though, if I'm being perfectly honest I did take a small nibble of the end of the breadstick just to satisfy the craving so I wouldn't eat the whole thing when no one was looking! I figure, lose the battle win the war right!

I've been feeling good, a little tired of salads and beans but I am finding new ways to eat the foods I need to.
Again, at church it was hard to drink as much as I should during those 3 hours and eat at the times I need to. But I think I will figure that out too as I get more used to this way of life.

Honestly I just love that I'm losing weight. I feel full all. the. time. and once I can get my life back into the swing of things and get back into the gym I know that my results are going to be phenomenal!  I can not wait to be healthy and thin!!!

Friday, January 27, 2012

pink eye...

Alright, my lack of posting is because on Monday I woke up with pink eye in, not one, but both of my eyes! Yay! So because looking into any light caused me pain I have held off on blogging.
That doesn't mean I have failed at eating- maybe a little at the exercise part, but considering I could barely keep my eyes open, I figured walking on treadmill might be just a tad dangerous!

I went back to Dr. Chris Morgan on Wednesday to check on my progress and have another BIA test.
These are the results of my first one compared to my second one- only a week apart.
The cool thing is that I have lost 3.5 lbs on the scale but if you look on the fat mass line, I have actually lost 5 lbs of fat and gained a little bit of water weight, which as my body gets to used to drinking all the water I am putting in myself it will let go of it. That made me super happy knowing that just because the scale says one thing, doesn't mean that that is exactly what is happening in my body.

 Now, this next picture (sorry about the crappy lighting in both pics, I took them on my iPhone and it didn't do a great job lighting wise.) Shows where I started in relation to Phase Angle, Intracellular Water, Fat Mass, and ECM/BCM.

I didn't know what all that really meant so I assume maybe you wont either?
Let me explain them as my booklet does...

Phase Angle - Calculated using the measurements of resistance and reactance, which are indicators cellular health independent of weight. Normal values vary with age and gender.

So my Phase Angle started at 6.6, it should be greater than 7.4. Right now my Phase Angl (PA) is the same as a healthy 50 year old- Not cool! But as you can see in my BIA, in just one week my PA went from 6.6 to 7.0. Thats crazy!

Intracellular Water - Water volume of body cell mass (i.e., water in the "living" cells)

So my ICW was at 52.5 the first day, which is pretty close to the cells of a 60 year old! Man, this was an eye opener to just how unhealthy I had let my body become. Then, within one week I raised it 53.7, which is a step in the right direction and at least now I am getting closer to a 50 year old in that department too :)

Fat Mass - The amount of stored fat in the body

Okay so this one is pretty self explanatory, But this is where I learned I lost 5 lbs of fat instead of the 3.5 lbs my scale said. The first day I was 70.9 lbs of fat- yikes!! and in one week that had gone down to 65.9 lbs of fat in my body. And my lean body mass had increased by 1.5 lbs.

ECM/BCM - Ratio of extracellular mass (ECM) to body cell mass (BCM). A lower value, indicating a higher ratio of living to inactive mass, is desirable. Normal values are near 1.0 (a 50/50 distribution).

So here I started out at 1.04, you want to be 1 or lower I was told so I'm not too far off but still it could be better. Then within one week I got to a 1.01.

I love seeing the numbers change!

Another cool thing that Dr. Morgan showed me was that I had done a few BIA tests before I got pregnant with Owen while I was losing weight. I can't remember the results exactly- I'll see if I can find my printouts or next week I will get a copy of them, but it showed that even when I was 163 lbs my Phase Angle, ICW, and pretty much everything that was measured was actually worse off then than it is now even though I weigh more!
I realized that what I did to lose weight before, which was counting calories but still eating whatever I wanted and exercising, made me lose weight but my cells and insides were still suffering and not anywhere near 'healthy'. It was kind of an eye opener. I guess it's like those skinny people who eat fast food all the time and never gain a pound- I bet if they did a BIA, I could possibly have a 'healthier' body even thoughI may weigh 50 lbs more than them. Not that I want to stay this weight- no way- but it's nice to know I am moving in the right direction!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Sunday Sunday....

Well, today it has been hard to eat when I am supposed to. I'm sure I will figure out the whole church & snack and all that but trying to get 2 kids ready for 9 am church and eat my breakfast and make sure I have water with me and an Ultra meal drink or bar for later and snacks and books for the kids too is a little daunting.

Fortunately, I did get my breakfast- 2 scrambled eggs with 1/2 cup of black beans and 2 Tbsp of no sugar salsa. I grabbed an Ultra meal bar for between classes in church but between making sure Melia wasn't eating chalk, screaming at the top of her lungs, or biting the other kids in her sunbeam class and taking care of Owen, who just wants to walk everywhere and be held (I don't know if he realizes what a contradiction he is) I totally forgot to eat it. Then after church I fed the kids lunch and put them down for naps when my home teachers showed up, so lunch/snack got pushed back again.

And now I am headed over to my brothers for dinner. They are serving lasagna. I love lasagna. I can't eat lasagna. Well, maybe if its vegetarian I can just pull the noodles out? This new way of eating is pretty easy while I am at home, but going out is another story. Like my girlfriends want to go out to dinner for a girls night in a few weeks- I think I had better research where we go so that I know what I can order before I go and plan my breakfast and lunch accordingly. I'm not a big planner, at least not for myself- I've had to learn to plan ahead for Melia so we don't have meltdowns but not for myself, so this is definitely a learning curve for me.

On another note, I have this really thing I got for Christmas (thanks mom and dad!). It's called a Jawbone UP. It tracks my movement and sleep and I can even set it to remind me to move.
So its this bracelet, and it has a corresponding app on my iPhone that when I plug it in it shows me how many steps I've taken, what my sleep quality was, how many calories I have burned and a bunch of other things. It's so cool.
This was my sleep the other night. It shows how long I was asleep. If I got up (which Owen makes sure I do) My deep sleep vs. light sleep.... This was a good nights sleep and I felt it in the morning.

Also, it has a smart alarm that will wake you up during a light sleep cycle so you aren't so tired when you do wake up. You tell it you want to wake up by 7 (or whatever time) and within a half hour, so from 6:30-7:00 whenever you are in a light sleep cycle it will start vibrating the bracelet and wake you up. But, like this day, if you aren't in a light sleep cycle during that 30 minutes, it will vibrate at the time you set for your alarm. As you can see in the picture I was woken during my deep sleep and so I actually laid there for a while longer not wanting to get up yet because I was tired, but most mornings when my bracelet starts vibrating I just open my eyes and feel good to go.

Sorry this sounds like an ad for the UP, it's not I just love it. This, along with the app My Fitness Pal, I can keep track of pretty much everything I am doing- If any of you are on that app we can be 'friends'.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Day three...

So I have been on this new eating plan for three days now and I feel good. I never feel hungry, in fact it is almost hard to eat everything I need to still.

It's amazing, I feel like I am eating so much and yet I have ALREADY LOST WEIGHT!! According to my scale I started at 180.6 and this morning when I woke up and stepped on the scale it read 177.2! I couldn't believe my eyes- that is 3.4 pounds... in three days! I'm sure that it's just the shock to my body of working out and eating a lot healthier and it won't always be this way but still- talk about motivation!

I am still in the process of figuring out everything I can and can not eat. Most of my meals have been pretty close to what I ate the first day, but I went grocery shopping today and got some salmon and a bunch of veggies and fruits (I'm not the biggest fruit eater, especially berries, but I am going to choke them down until I love them!)
I even bought some Tofu! I have no idea if I will like it or even be able to stomach it, but I thought I would give it a try.

My knee has been acting up a bit too, but I still have walked on my treadmill for 30 minutes each day - I am actually about to jump on it as soon as I post this entry, and so even though my knee is sore I figure walking won't hurt it so I'd better keep going.

I am very excited at the progress I've seen so far and can't wait to meet my goal... Did I even mention that in my last post? I want to lose 50 lbs. I want to be thin for a photo shoot I won for May. I know I won't be at my goal weight by then but I will look a lot cuter and thinner!

Well, off to walk! Cant wait until winter ends and I can do it outside!

Thursday, January 19, 2012

and so it begins...

Before I got pregnant with baby #2 I wanted to go on a cruise. I made a deal with my husband that if I lost 40 lbs we could go. I came within 2-3 pounds of losing the full 40 lbs and even though I didn't 'make it' I had worked hard and so we went and had the time of our lives- resulting in baby #2!

After Owen was born my plan was to get right back to the gym at my 6 week mark, however, because my pelvis wasn't fully healed (I had fallen down the stairs at 7 months pregnant and busted my pelvic bone) and my three year old daughter, Melia, who has Rett Syndrome, was needing more medical attention (3 EEGs and an MRI within the first two months of Owens life) working out got pushed to the back burner.

Then, my husband left me. That, along with my three month old baby, special needs daughter and post pardum depression, made going to the gym- or even down to the treadmill in my basement- so low on my list of priorities that it just didn't happen.

Now that my baby boy is one year old and my daughter is in preschool 5 days a week, I decided it is time to take back my life and my health! I am sick of feeling like the skinny girl trapped in a fat body. I know I can lose weight, I've done it before. Though, I also had the freedom to leave at night to aqua-size or head out for a walk/jog when the kids went to bed. I don't have that luxury anymore.

 I can usually only workout between 9-11 am at the gym while Melia is in school, as long as Owen isn't sick and I can take him to the daycare. Or, I have to do it at home while they nap or after bedtime, and lets be honest, after they go to bed I am SO tired that I usually just want to veg out in front of the TV all night. Of course, that is how I got to where I am and so that needs to change.

Yesterday I went to my chiropractor, Chris Morgan, who is also a certified First Linem am handing over the reigns, tell me what to do, what to eat, when to exercise etc. and I will do it.

After being weighed (the scale at the office is about 8 lbs heavier than mine at home btw), testing my BIA, and a much needed adjustment, I went home with some Metagenics Ultra Meal powder and bars and a stack of information about my new lifestyle.
My first BIA Results

Today was my first day and lets just say I haven't been hungry once. In fact, I am finding it hard to actually eat everything I am supposed to eat today.

This was my plan for the day:

7:30 wake up - 10 oz of water
8:00 MorningMeal - 3/4 cup Oatmeal with vanilla extract, 1 medium apple & 10 oz of water
10:00 Snack - 1 Ultra Meal Shake made with 10 oz of water
12:00 Lunch - 3/4 cup canned tuna with 3 tsp mayo, salad using unlimited category 1 veggies & 15 oz of water
2:30 snack - Chocolate Ultra Meal bar & 10 oz of water
5:00 Dinner - 2 whole eggs with salsa and 1/2 cup black beans, salad with unlimited category 1 veggies, 12 baby carrots and 2 Tbsp sesame seeds, & 15 oz of water
8:00 snack - 1 medium apple & 10 oz of water

I missed my apple this morning and didn't have room for the salad at lunch but otherwise I have kept to my plan (so far, I am writing this at 4:15 so I haven't attempted dinner yet.)

I also need to walk (briskly) for 30 minutes each day- and I did that while the kids took their naps.

Well, so far the first day has been good. I will try to blog each day about my progress - and failings, because I am sure there will be some- and hopefully you can join me on my journey back to healthy living!